Stop the Cheating Mindset
Stop the Cheating Mindset
The holiday season and the start of a new year often bring feelings of guilt and rigidity about eating. Words like “cheat day” or “cheat meal” frequently come up in conversations about food and diet, but let’s pause and consider what these terms really mean.
What are we cheating on? And more importantly, who are we cheating?
Eating Is Not Cheating
I often say, “Eating is not cheating,” and it’s not just a catchy phrase—it’s a fundamental mindset shift I encourage. When people tell me they had a cheat day or a cheat meal, it raises the question: why is enjoying food framed as something wrong or rebellious?
If we look at other areas of life, cheating carries significant negative consequences:
In relationships, cheating breaches trust.
In academics, cheating leads to penalties and loss of credibility.
In sports, cheating can cost titles, medals, and reputations.
Why, then, do we apply this same language to food? Eating food you enjoy isn’t a betrayal or a failure; it’s simply nourishing yourself in a way that aligns with your preferences and needs.
The Emotional Weight of the Word “Cheat”
Using the word “cheat” implies guilt, shame, and the idea of breaking the rules. When you associate eating with guilt, it creates a harmful cycle:
You feel bad emotionally because you think you’ve done something wrong.
If someone else is reinforcing that guilt, it might be worth re-evaluating that relationship.
If it’s physical discomfort from overeating something, your body provides feedback—not punishment.
Food is not inherently “good” or “bad.” The way we consume it and our relationship with it matters. A single meal or snack doesn’t define your health or worth.
The Problem with “Cheat Days”
Many diet plans include cheat days, allowing a single day to indulge in foods labeled as “off-limits” the rest of the week. But what happens on those days?
Cheat days often result in overeating with a “last supper” mentality: I must eat this now because I can’t have it again for another week.
This approach undermines any positive changes made earlier in the week and perpetuates a cycle of restriction and overindulgence.
Food isn’t something to earn or restrict as a reward or punishment. Instead, it should be integrated into a balanced and sustainable eating pattern that regularly includes your favorite foods.
A Compassionate Approach to Eating
When I work with people, I encourage them to include all types of foods in their eating patterns—cookies, chips, fried chicken, or dessert. These foods aren’t “bad,” and eating them doesn’t make you a “cheater.”
Of course, moderation matters. Eating anything to excess isn’t healthy, whether vegetables or cake. But it’s also essential to move away from the notion that indulging in a treat is a moral failing.
Many negative feelings around food come from past experiences—either in childhood or from restrictive diets that labeled certain foods as off-limits. This baggage can take time to unpack, but the first step is recognizing that eating food, even food society may label as “unhealthy,” is not wrong.
Enjoying the Holidays and Beyond
This holiday season, let’s stop the cycle of guilt and enjoy food without judgment. A balanced eating pattern includes room for all kinds of foods—every day, not just on “special” days.
Craving cake? Have a slice and enjoy it.
Looking forward to holiday cookies? Savor them without the side of shame.
Remember: eating is not cheating. It’s nourishment, comfort, and sometimes joy. Your relationship with food doesn’t need to be a battlefield.
Real World Nutrition Refreshed: I am revitalizing and updating my archive of blogs and re-publishing them. Stay tuned as I review, update, refresh, and re-share these posts to provide you with even more valuable information on nutrition, health, and overall wellness—and keep things timely. A portion of this blog was initially posted on December 8, 2022, and is updated here.
