Carrot or the Stick – What Motivates You?
Carrot or the Stick – What Motivates You?
Many of us have goals, resolutions, those things we know we should do or want to accomplish, but something tends to get in the way.
These goals like exercising regularly, eating healthier, and finding more “down-time” are often something that needs focus year-round, not just at the start of the year, month, or week. And especially not AFTER a new medical diagnosis – as I have emphasized in recent posts.
But MOTIVATION is a big part of us achieving the goals we have. So many things can motivate people, and there are many reasons people choose not to do something they know is good for them. And, while I often hear that finding time is a big factor, I am not sure if that is true. When the term “binge-watch” is part of our collective vocabulary, I don’t buy that people don’t have time for their health.
But I will stay away from psychology and address two common approaches to this instilling motivation: the “carrot” approach and the “stick” approach that people may be familiar with even if they don’t know the term. We can also think of this as a reward or punishment.
For this, let’s take the example of working on your fitness routine - moving regularly. I have a fortune from a fortune cookie framed and sitting on a shelf in my closet that states, “Work on improving your exercise routine.” Nice. But is that motivating? Not really. Heck, I don’t even see it most days, even though it is right there in front of me. It is just a statement.
I know regular physical activity is essential. And I know that engaging in at least 150 minutes of regular physical activity each week reduces the risk for heart disease, diabetes, and cancer. And I know that engaging in 300 minutes a week is even better (all depending on the intensity of the exercise).
Exercise also helps relieve stress, helps reduce joint pain, and helps with many physical and mental conditions.
But somehow, even with all this knowledge, some weeks are just not meeting the mark of 150 minutes or more.
What can I do? And which should I choose: the carrot and the stick approach?
What does that even mean?
THE STICK
Think of this as the stick hitting the person. Not cool. The stick is the threat or the punishment. This is like hiring a personal trainer from the Biggest Loser or R. Lee Ermey (or any other drill sergeant, but he was the best) to scold me, yell at me, call me names, and make me feel bad.
And it doesn’t have to be a person doing this. It can be those voices in my head knowing and reminding me of the negative consequences of not exercising, such as getting cancer, diabetes, heart disease, losing muscle mass, losing bone mass, and a slow, miserable, untimely death.
Who wants that? But people do it all the time, and I know people who have family members who try to guilt them into exercise. It doesn’t usually work.
There are also punishments that can be set up, such as having to pay someone of the activity isn’t done. For example, I could have it set up that is I don’t do 600 minutes a week, I give someone else money. This could be giving it to a political party or a group that I don’t support.
THE CARROT
The flip side of the stick is the CARROT or reward type of motivation.
This approach is having someone encourage me, coax me, tell me I can do just a bit more, I am almost there, and help me move forward to a reward. The carrot dangling in front of me. (This idiom of the carrot and stick had a donkey involved, so the carrot makes more sense if you know this. The donkey would walk forward toward the carrot, and pull the cart, rather than being beaten with a stick.)
And often the reward? Feeling excellent and reduced risk of disease. And looking good with a healthy weight and body fat percentage as a bonus.
But is this enough?
Is having the “reward” of a healthier life enough?
Maybe, but maybe not?
Additional Carrots?
For many people, “just” feeling better and having the knowledge of being healthier isn’t enough. While I can use the example of exercise, this can also apply to healthier eating, going to bed as a set time to get adequate sleep or other lifestyle factors.
What are some more enticing “carrots”?
While some people will use a “cheat day” as a reward for eating healthy the rest of the week, I am not a fan of cheat days. My mantra is “eating is not cheating.”
But how about if I have my fruits and veggies for the day. All of them, then I have the chocolate to top off the day.
Or how about this?
If I exercise at least 600 this month, I get a pedicure. If I don’t, I must skip it.
If I exercise 1,500 minutes in the next three months, I treat myself to a massage (and the pedicure too).
And if I do the 3,500 minutes in six months, I get an additional spa treatment.
While this may not work for you, the carrot or reward isn’t food but for something I like, something I want, and something I will skip if I don’t get those minutes done.
Seriously, with some things, I need lots of carrots or rewards. For example, I was a morning exerciser in the past, getting up at 5 am to get it done. If I didn’t get up and do it then, I would never fit in exercise. And I wasn’t a “morning person” then. LOTS of carrots, but I did it for years. It became a habit and didn’t need as many carrots after a while.
Knowing this about myself, I do reward myself for the baby steps. And for you, it may seem like a lot, but I know what works for me. And I don’t do daily or weekly rewards; that reward is the personal satisfaction and feeling good about the accomplishments. But having the monthly bonuses and more significant quarterly rewards works for me.
For rewards, mini rewards, or more significant rewards, I try to stick to nonfood rewards. But occasionally, for a special occasion, I go for it, if it doesn’t take my goals backward.
Again, eating is not cheating, but I don’t want to take two steps forward, three steps back.
I know that not everyone needs a bunch of carrots like me (incremental, multiple rewards) or any carrots. That is the difference in personalities.
Find what works for you. What are your carrots? How do you motivate yourself?
